Reinvent yourself this summer

One of the greatest gifts of life is the ability to evolve. Subtly each of our lives makes an impact on the next generation and the next changing humanity as a race. Our lives are the microcosm to that macrocosm. Throughout life, we grow. We adapt. We change. Our cells are replaced over a 7 year cycle. Our body moves through the ageing process. (Whether we like it or not.) Our personalities too evolve depending on our social circles, our jobs and our roles. Consciously, or unconsciously, we are always reinventing ourselves. In fact one of the only constants in life is change. And that means that there will always be times in our lives when we need to reinvent ourselves.

Reinventing yourself isn’t about creating an alternate personality; it’s about expanding and recreating what you already have and who you already are. Reinvention is about adapting and evolving, expressing our fullest potential.  There is no shame in casting off your past and your old self. There is no shame in leaving your old self behind and creating someone completely new.

Often people connect reinventing themselves after a crisis a breakup, a divorce, a career failure, or by a change in external circumstances such as moving, changing schools. However, a reinvention of ourselves can be made at any time in our life. And a summer without the weighty responsibility and the luxury of more time is a perfect time to do a personality MOT.

Reinventing yourself is an empowering process when done consciously. And let me stress that reinventing yourself is a gift from you to you. It is you stepping into your own power. Respecting yourself and generating respect from others. Reinventing yourself is a form of levelling up in your life for you. Reinventing yourself should never be done for someone else. Make sure you are doing it for the right reasons and that the person you are becoming is continually gaining respect.

The druids believed that every 7 years we go through a transformation of mind and spirit. (Interesting when you think that our physical body regenerates every 7 years too). Now this year I am going to be 40. 2 years away from my next mind, body and spirit transformation. So I want to do some groundwork whilst I am in a happy and powerful space to reinvent myself again. Are you with me? Let’s grasp this summertime of opportunity together and take these 5 steps to begin our path to reinventing ourselves in the sun!!

Look at you now

In order to reinvent yourself, you have to start with an acceptance of who you are. With the flaw and your qualities.  Make a list of the strength and abilities you have in your life now. An brainstorm on what kind of person could use those qualities to the max if they were enhanced a little.

New Self image

Now take that brainstorm further and create a new self-image to serve as your guide to your new goal. Concentrate on actually pulling yourself away from your old comfort zones, habits, roles and self-perceptions. It doesn’t mean you have to drop the bits of your life that you love, just tweak you now into a new mental image. A new self-image will always remind you of why you’re trying to change. I love the idea of making a vision board of this new self-image combining the best of the old with the inspiration of the new.


Now down to the nitty-gritty. How are you going to make this reinvention come about?What actions will you take? What do you need to do? Are there books you might need to read? Or are there habits you need to form. Brainstorm a humongous list of ideas. Now look at this list and choose 2 or 3 that you can begin with straight away. Remember the summer is a great time to begin cultivating new habits. If you have ever read “The happiness project! by Jenna James (and if you haven’t GO NOW and get it -it’s seriously a summer inspiration book), you will know how she dedicated a year of her life to reinventing herself systematically through a yearly plane. Find ways to do this for you. It might be theming each week or following a checklist.

Try new things

Nothing helps reinvention than trying new things. If something challenges me I know I have to do it. I have to take that leap and cross my comfort zone to grow. So do you! It the same with your plans. Sometimes we don’t know if solutions actually work until we try them out.  So now you are on holidays throw yourself into something new, something challenging to kick-start the launch of the new you!

Remind yourself every day of your commitment.

Write your goals in different-sized cards and scatter them at home and at work in places where you can easily see them. This way, you will constantly be reminded of where you want to be. You have to be your own team coach. It’s okay to fail but you also have to get back on the horse and try again. When you fail, simply recognize it, learn from it and move on. Remember to acknowledge your successes as much as your failures. Celebrate them. Praise yourself and treat yourself. After all, if you can’t treat you and celebrate you how can you expect anyone else to. So claim your moments of success as you move forward and evolve.


There is nothing holding you back from being the person you always imagined you could be. There is nothing stopping you but yourself. So, decide who you are going to be, which version of yourself is going to command attention and respect, and mould yourself into that image. Empower yourself with this process. Feel the inspiration of the summer sun and recharge yourself a new this holidays.

Have an amazing week <3

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#lifelessons101- Use your summer to learn to be in the now


We all know that either being overly focused on the next thing we have to do or obsessing over past events is bad for our mental health. It makes for a busy mind, a lack of focus, stress and generally makes life less enjoyable for us and our loved ones. There is a lot of talk these days about being in the now, being fully in the present moment as the cure, the ultimate medicine for stress. I have even read on author’s statement that “You can’t reach your full potential until you learn to live your life in the present”.  Being in the now means to live consciously, to fully experience ourselves and our surroundings without redundant thoughts and other distractions. It brings to mind a life of mindful practice, meditation and balanced harmony.


Sounds great in principle. However, for me in the busy whirlwind of my life, I have found it increasingly difficult to embrace mindfulness when I am running from meeting to meeting, trying to remember the shopping list and call my mother-in-law simultaneously. I resemble less the peaceful Buddha more the headless chicken on a treadmill. Being in the now centres around habit forming and reprogramming the brain. And despite all of my good intentions, I don’t seem to be able to tune in to that inner calm in the middle of Bilka when I have a train to catch.

But now the summer holidays loom. The usual treadmill of my brain is slowing down and the outside pressures trickle away. This (I believe) is the perfect time for me to truly bring into practice the art of living in the now. It may seem like cheating. After all living in the now is supposed to be most useful in times of inherent stress. But I say balls to that! For me when I am relaxed connecting with the present moment is simply easier. Without the constant pressure of work or school trying out new practices and reflecting becomes 10 times more achievable.

The summer holidays brings ample opportunity to learn new habits and behaviours. And what could be better than returning to work armed with a pocket full of habits that you can draw on whenever you need them. So if you want to return after the summer with a stronger sense of inner peace and equipped to deal with pressure take the chance this summer to appreciate your now. And if you are not sure how here are 5 tips to get you started


Taking time to close your eyes and breath is a wonderful way to centre yourself. To notice what is going on both within and around you. There are lots and lots of techniques out there. For example, the ‘mindfulness body scan is a classic. Personally, I prefer The easiest and shortest meditation technique as described by author Sherri Melwani:

Here’s the technique:

“1. Right here, right now, bring all your awareness to your breath. Shift your focus down to the belly and allow the belly to soften as you deepen your breath.

  1. Now mentally repeat to yourself, “Breathing In, I calm myself. Breathing out, I smile.” Say this like a mantra as many times as you need until you feel the shift.
  2. Notice the corners of your mouth begin to curl, even if just a tiny little bit, even if you have to pretend. Notice how your breath becomes a bit more even and deep. The subtle smile brings relaxation and carries the message “all will be OK” to your mind and body.
  3. That’s it! So simple and quick. Try it and feel free.”

Don’t try to quiet your mind

The hardest thing to do when living in the moment is, or trying to simply witness life, is to not have the urge to try to quiet your mind. When we try to quiet the mind, we just disturb it all the more. Witness your thoughts as if they are pure sound. Don’t try to judge your thoughts, there are no good thoughts or bad thoughts. Just notice what is there and what you are thinking.

Walk in nature

Go for a walk in nature and just observe. See, smell, listen. I highly recommend walking in bare feet or simply stopping and sitting. Nothing can be more peaceful than watching the ripples on water or the light dancing between the leaves of a tree’s canopy.

Disconnect for 1 hour a day

Get away from your phone, your computer and immerse yourself in something else. Reading is a great way to be present. As is being creative. Another great way is to have a shower and be conscious of the feeling. Choose an activity and really focus on that experience.

Slow down -actively listen and observe

How often do you truly listen when someone talks to you? How often do you see what is really in front of you? Try to hyper-focus in the moment. Slow down time in your mind. Take a breath before you respond in a conversation. Take a moment to drink in your surroundings. Give yourself the opportunity to feel alive.


You and ICherish the Moment (1).jpg have this amazing gift called life. The present moment is the only real moment we can experience. Connect with that this summer and you will find not only do you feel more peaceful but your experience of contentment in your life will increase tenfold. Give yourself the gift of experiencing the now this summer


HAve an amazing week <3


Make your own 7 day Summer  Challenge!

Summer holidays huzzah!! The perfect time to relax, kick back and challenge yourself! I can hear you saying “yes, yes and whhaaat!’ to that sentence. Normally Summer holidays are not associated with challenging yourself. The primary focus is self-care. And I completely agree we need this time to wind down and enjoy yourselves. However, the summer holidays are also the perfect time to try something new. And without the usual outside pressure factors on your schedule such as work or school the summer holidays is the most optimal time to start a new habit.

I love challenges. Especially in the summer as I am more carefree and less busy so I can indulge myself in them. At the same time, I don’t want my summer holidays to turn in to work so I have created the concept of the 7 day Summer Challenge. 7 days is not a long time but it is a time where you can begin something new and indulge in it without it becoming work. I have done all sorts of different 7-day summer challenges. They can be serious or silly. Last year I really wanted to change and expand my diet repertoire at the same time I wanted to sleep in. So I created the 7 days of brunch challenge. Quite simply I had to try a new recipe for brunch every day. Armed with my newly made Pin full of recipe ideas, each day I made my brunch and posted a pic on Fb to celebrate my achievements. It went down a storm and I had so much fun. This small 7-day challenge opened up new taste and culinary experiences and made me feel fantabulous. A wonderful way to celebrate my life and my holidays. (And yes I am doing it again this summer!)

There are billions of small challenges you can make into a 7-day summer challenge. So grab one of these ideas, make your own hashtag and throw yourself into celebrating the moment in a fun and inspiring way!  


7 days of brunch

– Seriously this one is so fun here is my Pin to give you some ideas

7 dates in 7 days

– Take yourself on 7 crazy dates (You can invite other people if you like). You don’t have to spend a lot of money to have a great date here are some ideas to get you started.


7 days of amazing mornings

– Hal Elrod’s inspiring concept of The Miracle Morning one hour dedicated to your personal growth every day is even easier to start in the holidays. Of course, I recommend to do it every day but as a quick start, boost give yourself the 7-day challenge to start your day amazingly.
7 days of something new-

What haven’t you done that you have always wanted to try? NOw is the time to do it. Choose a week and do something new every day

7 days of meditation

– Meditation we know feeds body and soul. Been having trouble keeping up your practice then use the summer downtime to cultivate the habit.

7 days of self-care

– Invest in you and do something amazing for yourself every day for 7 days. This is pure pampering and you will feel sooo good and loved by the end of this challenge.

7 days of a sustainable lifestyle

– Want a greener lifestyle and don’t know where to start? Try this challenge.  Basically for 7 days Eat. Move and Live Sustainably. This idea comes from the sustainability project 7 Days Challenge. Here is some info to inspire you:

7 days of kindness

– Use your 7 days to make the world a nicer place by actively seeking and creating oppertunties to be kind.

7 days of exercise

– Take part in a different type of exercise everyday!


The sky is your limit! What would you love to do for 7 days? Choose it.  Plan it. Do it. And share it! Remember to post your pics here and on the fb group of your #7daysummerchallenge 🙂

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Make sure you have the best summer ever by making Summer Goals !!

Summer holidays are nearly here! In fact, for me, they are only 5 days away! I don’t know about you but this time always feels slightly like torture for me. On the one hand, I want to get stuff wrapped up and yet work is insanely hard to concentrate on because my mind is buzzing with all the things I want to be doing when I am on my holiday. Years ago I would half burn out before the holidays. Sleep for the first week and then end up going back to work having done half of everything I had wanted to do. Which of course meant starting back at work resentful and unhappy. Not a healthy or productive state to be in after a holiday.

Luckily for me (and now for you guys) around 15 ish years ago I met someone who changed all this.  I met a wonderful inspiring woman who will always be known to me as the Blue Faery. This amazing woman was one of the first to introduce me to planning, goal setting and evaluating progress. (You might be thinking what the heck has that got to do with enjoying my summer holidays, just bear with me and I promise it makes sense!) Now all of that is normally considered very focused, concentrated work, in other words, adulting with a capital A. However when it came to holidays the Blue Faery threw all of that grown-up stuff out of the window and used the techniques in a completely different way.

Now you see she had a very Adult job, you know the practically 75- 80 hour a week job. Her five weeks of summer holidays were very precious. She understandably viewed them as the reward for all of her hard work throughout the rest of the year.  So she devised the simple system of the Summer Goals Poster! Every year on the first day of her holidays she would make an A3 poster with her summer goals. The rules are concise. 90% of the things you put up here have to be fun and things you want to do. You can have 10% of have too’s, if you really must. But NO more than 10%. And then you decorate your poster, drawings, glitter you name it. This poster is to focus on fun and you having a good time. In a way a mini bucket list to guide you through and create an amazing summer!

I will never forget the first time the Blue Faery and I made them together. Our posters spread across the floor as we returned to the age of 5 laughing, drawing, cutting, sticking and glueing. With a cold glass of wine and good company, I felt jubilant. The poster went up in my house and I did everything on there that year. When the summer was over I went to work feeling refreshed and satisfied. And I have done it every summer since.

It is amazing how powerful taking the time to focus on our the things we really want to do makes such a powerful shift in our energy. My Summer Goals Poster helps me to really invest in me each year and makes certain I remember to have fun. (Something very important to a self-employed workaholic!) I have never felt I have wasted my summers since the year I began doing this. Making my plans clear in a fun and childish way always sets the tone of a fun and free summer.

As a regular feature of my summer making my Summer Goals Poster marks the start of the holidays. The putting away of grown-up responsibility and signals me stepping into the time where  I decided when and where I do things. I have done this alone, with my family, I believe the Blue Faery makes them with her daughter every year and this year I will be making them with Mr T. I honestly cannot put into words how empowering this process is. I can just recommend you try it. And I know if you do this and make crossing off these goals important you will have the best ever summer every year!

So to make your own summer goals poster

  • Find an A3 piece of paper or card.
  • Gather felt tips, glitter, magazines glue and scissors and anything else you want to decorate your poster with.
  • Find a friend and grab a glass of something that you love.
  • Write SUMMER 2018 at the top of your paper and write out your summer goals.
  • Decorate like crazy
  • Put it up somewhere you will see it every day
  • Follow your goals and tick them off as you go along.
  • Have an amazing summer!!!!

Share pics of your summer goals posters to inspire us all to have the best summer ever <3

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Why when things are going well do we focus on the bad stuff?  (And how to stop doing it!)

Last week was actually amazing, all things considering. I had 10 amazing success stories from my clients that I am working with. I ran a brilliant training. My Hedwig arrived in the post. Lead some powerful workshops and a few new exciting business opportunities are opening up for me. And yet here I am sitting amidst all of this success feeling all negative. Why? Because of a negative incident in a meeting.  In reality, the meeting wasn’t actually that bad. Only 10 % was negative, 10 % didn’t go the way I wanted it to, the rest was amazingly positive. So how can I in all of this success and abundance feel negative?

You must have felt this before. The negative remark of a friend about your clothes followed with the but you look perfect in anything, or the performance review where you boss makes just one suggestion for an improvement, or even the perfect evening in the restaurant interrupted by the loud, annoying couple sitting next to you. In these situations what do we remember? The negative.

It used to make me wonder and worry if I was just incapable of appreciating the good in life when this happened. However, throughout the years I discovered I am not alone. Everyone experiences this at some point, if not often in their life. Feeling negative, despite all of the positive good things around us or in our lives, is a relatively common experience. And the reason why we all have these experiences is simple. It is because we are human. We are designed that way.

If you have a tendency for detecting and dwelling on the negative, it’s no cause for alarm. In fact, you are simply a product of intelligent human design. (Or come from Jutland) Humans were designed to be keenly aware of negative circumstances and consequences as it helped our ancestors survive. It is part of our internal system that identifies danger and tries to protect us. Our biology tells us instinctively it is safer to be negative. Bad memories stick harder than good to protect us from creating the same situation again.  Which also makes it easier to understand why we tend to believe negative personal criticism above positive reinforcement. It is our bodies way of eliminating risks and keeping us alive.

Understandable albeit not always helpful. Over-focusing on negativity is as we all know destructive and often depressing. Ironically this self-preservation method can become really destructive if left to its own devices. And who wants to be negative. I would much rather be sitting here feeling the glow of my successes than wallowing in the other stuff.  So the challenge is how to stop doing it? Well, my opinion here differs from the traditional here. You can read hundreds, if not thousands of articles out there on how to stop being negative and be more positive. The majority of them are effective, but they also suppress the body’s natural, instinctual survival system that causes the negative emotions in the first place. Not healthy in my opinion. A bit like putting a handkerchief on a wound that needs stitches. A quick and not long lasting fix. I personally believe that we need this system our bodies have created to identify and survive danger. The trick I have found to stop being caught in the negativity spiral is to control it and consciously have it work for you. Instead of it controlling you and ultimately working against you.

If you like me have suddenly found yourself caught up focusing on the negative despite all the good going on around you try my method of working with your body’s survival system to find your way back to feeling positive again.


Whatever caused the negative feeling is provoking one of you internal dramas. An internal drama is a behavioural response to a situation based on previous experience. It might be that you know exactly which drama is being set off. Or you may be responding unconsciously. In order to learn from your body’s auto survival system, you need to know why this particular situation sets of your internal drama. What is it that you feel unsafe about in this situation? Why does it affect you so strongly? In the example of the restaurant, it could be that the annoying couple sets off a drama related to a situation where peoples intrusive behaviour has affected you negatively in the past. Identifying how you feel “threatened” is half of the battle.


Now you need to step back and find out what is the teaching in this situation. What is your body trying to protect you from? How can you make sure you feel safe? It may be that you need to work with the internal drama.  It could simply be that you need to work out a strategy which allows you to feel comfortable in the situation.

For example in my meeting one of my observations made a person in a higher authority react explosively in anger.  Hours later I was still focusing on that rather than the other positive experiences in the same meeting. Unconsciously this was caused by an internal drama related to a previous job where I was fired and left in a financial mess. In essence, this meeting has in my unconscious threatened my ability to survive. The teaching was to recognised that the anger was not actually directed at me and my observations. Basically to not take on the responsibility of blame for someone else’s emotional. And to really realise that this was not threatening my existence. In Fact, I realised that the explosive emotion was showing the other person’s passion and commitment to solving the problem observed.


The next step is action. Our biological self- preservation response is actually calling us to action. Do something about this. Now if we immediately respond without processing we will be working from our fight or flight system. In the case of my meeting, I could have emailed the person after the meeting looking for positive reinforcement that they were not angry with me and apologising for making them angry. Putting myself into a position when I accepted blame. Making myself, in fact, more vulnerable. After identifying and gaining perspective I realised that the best course of action was to handle the problem at hand. To take responsibility for the solution, not the anger. I felt instantly safe. In control. Consequently, I felt happier.

Identifying your action and taking that action is one of the best ways to calm down your biological self- preservation system. Of course, when dealing with internal personal drams the actions may take longer than in my example. It may be that you need to process and accept previous traumas. This is itself a teaching of the situation.

Positivity boost

So once you have made yourself feel safe you will need a positivity boost to get you back on track. For me, gratitude practice works well. Writing a list of my blessings and the things I am grateful for immediately turns my thoughts to a positive cycle. Other people dance to music, meditate, train, play computer games, indulge in self-care or simply complete a simple task like washing up to get a feeling of success. Do something that will shift your thoughts into positive again.


Your biological self- preservation system makes you focus on the negative for a reason. Just like a malware warning on your pc. By acknowledging its presence, identifying the issue. Then by processing, taking action and rebooting the pc of your mind you will function at optimal capacity. The more often you do this the less the negative will take over and deny you the peace, contentment and safety of recognising the positive in your life.

Have a great week <3

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Lifelessons101 – Are you stuck in a personal development burnout?

I love my life, I really do. I love my job, my home, my man. So it came as a shock when I realised I wasn’t feeling entirely satisfied with the way things are. Not only unsatisfied I felt drained of all energy and constantly tired, even though I am living close to my perfect life. I was perplexed! How could I not be feeling satisfied? Why am I so exhausted? My life is great. It simply didn’t make sense. I needed some objective perspective. So I contacted my amazing coach and mentor for help, and he came with a mind-blowing perspective. I am suffering from personal development burnout. And by burnout, I am not referring to the psychological condition caused by years of stress. I mean burned out by the effort of overworking yourself on the personal development path.

Apparently, personal development burnout is a thing and actually quite common. (Phew good to know I’m normal). Just as with any hobby its possible to go too far over the edge. Or worse make your development into a chore, which then initiates the shame cycle when you don’t do it. For me, my dissatisfaction was coming from a universal classic. I am not yet exactly where I want to be. The exhaustion is simply that in my quest to improve myself I have been pushing myself to my limits and beating myself up for not being where I want to be right now. That cycle of self-blame took my energy and because I wasn’t seeing the results I wanted all had become a chore.

Personal development burnout seems to be an integral part of the journey. As my coach said life can’t be perfect and blissful all the time. The burnout comes when you need to shift. To create a balance. To grow in a different way. It’s a level up on a computer game. The frustration before the prize. However, unlike in a computer game instead of pushing ourselves harder, personal development burnout creates the opportunity to let go.

If you relate to this, you’re not alone. I and many others get you.

While personal development can provide valuable resources to get you through some challenging times, if you find yourself falling into the impatient, frustration trap and cycle of guilt as I did then it’s time to recoup, reassess and change what you are doing so it works for you. After this is your personal growth no-one else’s. So it has to work for you.

Recovering from a burnout at it’s worst can take a long, long time. However, with the kind of personal development level up burnout, I am talking about it is possible to recover quickly if you consciously take actions. Here are the phases and actions I am working through to get me back on top in a healthy path of natural growth.

Phase 1: Stop reaching for whatever you have been reaching for

The first order of business is to interrupt the pattern. Once you stop the pattern of thoughts and feelings that got you to burn out, that’s when recovery begins.

Ask yourself:

  • What have I been obsessed with that feels unreachable?
  • What is my biggest fear if I stop reaching?
  • What would it look like to surrender?

The scariest thing about letting go is that you don’t know how the world will look afterwards. Allow this process to calm your nerves to letting go.

Phase 2: Acknowledge how far you have come

If you have got into this burnout you will have grown. Although you are feeling worn out there has been progression. Look at when you started your journey and write a list of your achievements since that time. Sometimes just seeing what you have done already will help to boost your energy levels.

Phase 3: Take a break

Now stop take a break. As soon as you can. Book a holiday or a few weeks off. Make your health priority number 1. You need to refuel and do some serious TLC work. Cancel social arrangements. I don’t give a damn about how people may feel let down you need a break. Getting into the guilt cycle is all about your ego. It’s your ego that wants to be recognised to get the prize. Right now you need to feed your soul not your ego Step away from social media. Read a book. Get a massage. Sit in your garden. Sleep. Train. Swim. Do what gives you energy and peace. At this stage you need to make your health your priority. Without you nothing works. Your body is your team and support system. So take care of you and your health.

And for at least 14 days do not think about your personal development or your goals. Just be you for a change. You are perfect as you are.

Phase 4: Clear out

One of the things that feeds the guilt factor is the constant bombardment of social media and in our inbox of all the things we could be doing to be better or have greater lives. I have found it incredibly refreshing to unsubscribe from 90% of the personal development newsletters I belonged to. My inbox is clearer and it is surprising how less pressured I feel. Have an electronic clear out and choose what influences you want in your life and what is suepurpulus. Do the same with the books. (All of us personal development junkies have a pile we haven’t read yet). Choose one. Just one and put the rest away.  Have a look at your daily and weekly habits. Which ones make you feel good. Which don’t. Guess what you are gonna do? That’s right get rid of all the ones that don’t make you feel good. Clearing out makes everything feel better and less pressured.

Phase 5: Appreciate your abundance

Gratitude is one of the simplest and most powerful tools we have. Being grateful makes us appreciate our here and now. And if you like me have been focusing on the end post, then you have forgotten to enjoy your journey here and now. Practise gratitude for your life at least once a week and appreciate the abundance of your now.

Phase 6: Listen to your inside voice

Make sure you are listening to you inside voice. It is there to guide you. One of the reasons burnout happens is because we don’t act on the signals our body is giving us. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it. Follow your gut feelings before you say yes. Your gut knows what you want better than your mind does. So for once let it lead you.

Phase 7: Refocus

As you begin to have more energy (as a constant presence, not just on intermittent days) you are ready to refocus your personal development ideas. Look at what you were doing. Remove anything that was either setting off your guilt complex, you I should be doing this voice and especially anything that drained you energetically. Be HONEST with yourself. Don’t keep practices because other people have told you they work or you need to do. Keep what works for you.

Now choose one, (Yes I said one), area of your personal development you would like to work on and honestly feel energetically able to commit to. (Again listen to your gut). Make this the priority for the next 6 months.  I would also recommend here trying something new. It can be an energy boost to use a new technique for personal growth after burnout.

Phase 8: Take baby steps forwards

You cannot jump from burnout back to full power. It doesn’t work like that. If you try and throw yourself into a massive lifestyle change all at once you will end right back at burnout. So take baby steps. Do one little thing each week, Then each day. Build up slowly and you will find it becomes manageable. Baby steps make us stronger.


Give yourself time to recover from personal development burnout. At least 6- 8 months to work through the phases Burnout is a sign of not listening to yourself. It is the most important lesson we gain from this experience is to centralise and make ourselves important. There’s a fine line between self-improvement and personal development burnout. Allow your burnout to show you where that line is and learn how to keep your balance for healthier and stronger growth.

Have a happy weekend <3

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Appreciating the moment during your busyness – 2 simple tricks to help

Summer holidays are just around the corner. And if you are like me this month is packed solids with both work and social events. I can feel myself longing for the relative peace of my summer holidays already. Which although is perfectly natural, is also really sad. Just think about how many people are sitting around you at this moment who are wishing they were a month ahead in time and were not where they are right here and now. Thousands of us daydreaming a month of our lives away, every year.  A month of the year where the majority of the collective consciousness of humanity (at least in the western world) does not want to be where they are. Dreaming of the future not living in the present. What kind of unconscious impact does that create in our lives?





By living in the future not the now we create a negative experience for ourselves in the here and now. Tolstoy said “ There is only one time that is important – NOW! It is the most important time because it is the only time that we have any power.”  And he was right. The only moment we can affect and be in control of is the here and now. When we wish for the future to be now we give all of our power away.  ANd our happiness.

Psychologist Matt Killingsworth—a happiness researcher has shown through his work that people who allow themselves to not be present actually report being 10% less happy than they were when they focused on the present—regardless of what they happened to be doing. And happiness begets all sorts of benefits—like improved health, productivity, creativity, and innovation. Who knew that wishing for that summer holiday to be right now was actually so damaging to you!

Not that I am saying don’t look forward to your holiday. Of course, you should. You deserve it. It is simply by keeping your thoughts on longings there you are missing out on the benefits of enjoying the here and now. Such as stronger emotional connections, powerful memories and personal satisfaction.  When we are present we can influence our experience. Life amplifies and strangely enough instead of having less we actually have a sense of having more time as time slows down.

A happier life with more time, peace and satisfaction – sign me up! I mean who doesn’t want that. And who of you reading just thought sounds great. Only I will have to start working on it next week/month/year because I have X, Y and Z to get through first. And that my friends, is the trap. That’s the thought path that will lead you an hour from now to wishing yourself away to July. Again. Being present takes a lot less energy than you would think. Small actions make big differences to your satisfaction.

And I have found two simple tricks to bring you into the present immediately.

Use your senses

The first is learning to work with your natural ally. Your Senses. When you pay attention to your five senses, you can’t listen to your internal reel. Our senses are so powerful that if we ally with them we become instantly focused on the moment we are in. They close down mental chatter by allowing your neurons to connect with what is in front of you rather than what is in your head.  I found that by taking time to connect with my senses t gave me a moment of calm. A feeling of being rooted and strong in myself and gave me the chance to check in with myself and my needs.

Try  it yourself with these simple steps:

  • Designate a specific time in your day to focus on what’s in front of you.
  • Bring your mind back each time it tries to sneak off. Just say, “No, I’m doing that right now. I’ll get back to worrying later.”
  • Ask yourself throughout the phase, “What do I hear, see, taste, feel, and smell?”

Anytime you feel disconnected from yourself and/or your family,  or find yourself wishing a month of your life away simply unplug and tune into what’s surrounds you. You’ll notice a huge difference in your mental energy and happiness.

Do one thing at a time

I was a multitasking junkie. I used to pride myself on my ability to do at least 6 things at once until I realised that multitasking is the real-life soul splitting experience of creating a Horcrux (See Harry Potter). As we divide our attention into so many small pieces we make a shadow copy of ourselves. A weaker and more vulnerable version. We get stretched too thinly. By doing one task well. By focusing on that task alone we gain time. You see time really is just a concept. If we are rushing around like a headless chicken trying to do everything we run ragged always playing catch up. The fact is if you fill your time too much, trying to do it all at once you feel rushed. Your sense of time distorts and becomes limited. Doing just one thing at a time allows you to use the time that is there without panic thus creating the illusion of having more time and at the same time life flows more easily.


The ground-breaking research by Harvard Psychologist Matt Killingsworth (2010)found that 47% of the time we are not present in our lives. That’s almost half of our lives! Look forward to your holidays yes. But don’t waste your time wishing away your here and now. We all slip out of the moment occasionally. But by connecting with our senses we bring ourselves back to our root and by doing one thing at a time we give ourselves the gift of freeing our minds to enjoy the time that we have, influencing our experiences and empowering our lives.

HAve a beautiful week <3


#lifelessons101- Are you having enough fun in your life?

Recently life has been getting to me and I have had no idea why. My business is great. My home (although probably needs a clean) is lovely, Mr T is wonderful, my friends are great. I am doing what I want to do, aligned with my life purpose and yet I felt unsatisfied. (And cross with myself for feeling that). Then I spent a wonderful day in Copenhagen alone doing some of the things I love. I got brunch, shopped and then had a wonderful trip to a Royal palace where I got to dance in an empty ballroom (well, the guard wasn’t there and I had it all to myself!) and spent the rest of the day in a tiara. It was lovely, spontaneous and fun.

And then it dawned on me. I am seriously missing fun in my life. In my hyper-focused goal-oriented life I had forgotten the key component. Fun. I had fallen into the Entrepreneur trap of existing. Existing isn’t about material needs. You may have a Ferrari in the driveway of your beautiful home overlooking a majestic view. It isn’t about family either. You may have a wonderful and loving family. It isn’t about health; you may be very fit. So what is Existing? It is an inner void – a lack of inner joy. For the most part, you are successful. Yet, you still feel like there should be more to life than this. And there should. Life should also be fun.

So me being me, and loving google-fu, I began to do a bit of research online. And I feel across Daniel Kahneman Ted Talk The riddle of Experience vs Memory, which reveals how our “experiencing selves” and our “remembering selves” perceive happiness differently. Teh “experiencing self” defines our happiness in the moment. Whereas the “remembering self” defines happiness in our memory. I realised that my remembering self could look over my life in the last year and remember that I have been happy in my abundant life. Yet at the same time due to the focus, I put into my work, by overly focusing on the goal posts of this year’s plans I was on a day to day basis experiencing more work than fun. No wonder I wasn’t feeling great, even when things are going to well.  And of course, if you don’t feed your “experiencing self” enough fun then your “remembering self” has nothing new to remember, resulting in frustration.


The irony is that society rather frowns on having fun when it is actually one of the most fundamentally important building bricks of a happy life. (Something society knows is incredibly important. Having fun balances the mundane activities such as paying the bills or cleaning the house. Fun produces happy hormones which in the face of adversity allow us to strengthen our resilience. And not in the least it makes us more productive. Think about school, the lessons you remember and learnt the most were the ones you enjoyed. Fun is essential to happiness and a balanced life.

Are you having enough fun in your life? And I am talking about real fun not the fake “fun” activities such as spending the holidays with your in-laws or the team building days. I am talking about real fun. The kind that makes you smile from ear to ear, your eyes light up and your belly hurt from laughing. Or even just the kind of fun that gives you a wonderful feeling of contentment with the world.  Research professor Brene Brown, Ph.D., writes in her best-selling book The Gifts of Imperfection, “A critically important component of wholehearted living is play… Play is as essential to our health and functioning as rest (but) spending time doing purposeless activities is rare. In fact for many of us it sounds like an anxiety attack waiting to happen.”

Is it really so difficult to have fun?

Well for some of us it is. I decided that enough is enough and I want to reclaim the fun in my life. To allow my experiencing self to have fun. Great plan! But how? I have currently little time and limited resources. A challenge to be met! A few hours later I had created a process to stop the anxiety attack of having fun. Consequently, I am feeling happier and healthier already. Not that every day is perfect. It’s just now that every day has some fun in it that I can experience in the now and remember happily after.

If you need to have some more fun in your life try my process, put it into action and within hours you will begin to feel the fun factor exploding into your life. A fabulous way to feel happier, enjoy your journey and love your life!

Find your smiles

Sit down with a notebook and list things you enjoy—anything from scratching your head to dancing in a palace. As you write down each item, consider doing that very thing later today or this week or this year. You’ll have different emotional reactions to each idea. One emotional reaction, in particular, will signal that your sense of fun has been awakened and is pointing the way to a joyful, meaningful life. Do that thing whatever it is as soon as you possibly can!

Remember fun through the eyes of a child

In your notebook, begin listing things you remember enjoying as a child. Pay particular attention to things that made you “lose time,” so that hours seemed to disappear in seconds. What absorbed you that completely? Look for patterns in this childhood fun. Choosing activities that fit this code will make you happier and more purposeful across the board.

Fun journal

Keeping a fun journal is a great way you remind you of the fun you are having in your life.

Every day jot down a brief list of your major activities. Give each experience a fun “score,” with zero meaning no fun and ten is the MOST FUN EVER! As the days go by, you’ll begin to see which activities and people yield the most fun—and you’ll be surprised

Make time for fun

Block out time for fun each week. It can be a day, an evening, or even a lunch hour, but you should set aside some time to do some of whatever you came up with as a pure fun activity. You don’t have to do it by yourself, but if you bring along family members or friends

Randomise your fun

Write down all your ideas for fun activities and put them in a hat. Pick out one and do it. Just go for it. Trust the randomness of the universe to give you an amazing time.

Have a spontaneous day

Set aside a day to be spontaneous. Wake up and ask yourself what you want to do (and hiding under the duvet or on the couch is a non option). Now go do that activity. When it’s done start again from the beginning. The rules of the day? Simply follow your heart and your instinct.

Create a new holiday

Why not create a National Girlfriends’ Getaway Day or mango eating day, or finger painting day? First, define what  the day means to you and then invite others to join in the fun!


If I have inspired you then I would love you to return the favour by telling me how you are bringing more fun into your life! Together we can make our lives happier and each others

Have a weekend filled with fun <3


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Why is self-love so important in your life? (Take this quiz to find out)

When I was a kid self-love was not something you heard about. Growing up in the 80’s in a middle-ish class British family, it was expected that you would be academically astute, career focused and productive in every aspect of your life. The pressure was on and that was considered a good thing. No-one talked about taking breaks or taking care of yourself. It was all about what you did in work and play. A strong contrast to today where even a 2nd grader can give you an informed explanation of self-love! There is so much of hype about self-love. Today it is not only the social norm, healthy self-love is known to be one of the keys to confidence and contentment in life. We automatically know that self-love is important.

However how often do you stop and think why is self-love important to you? I mean it’s all well and good the specialists, the coaches and psychologists and the non-specialists on the internet telling you self-love is important. If you never decide that self-love is something important for you, you will never take the conscious step to loving you. And in my world that is a sad state of affairs.

For me working with self-love affects 3 areas in my life. It strengthens my self-esteem, my self-power and my sense of security. The more empowered and loved I feel in these three areas the more content I feel in life. Now maybe that will be the same for you maybe not. However today I have one goal. And that is to help you find out why working with self-love is important to you here and now in your life.

So here for you is a little exercise to inspire you to get clear on why self-love is important in your life and which of the three areas you need to work on right now. It takes only a few minutes and it will be the catalyst for making your journey in life more wonderful, powerful and content. (Not bad for a few minutes thinking right?!)

Ask yourself the following questions (and write down your answers)


  1. Do I feel loved in my life? YES/NO
  2. Do I feel confident? YES/NO
  3. Do I feel devastated if I fail? YES/NO
  4. Do others opinions of me matter more than my own? YES/NO
  5. Do I feel I deserve love? YES/NO
  6. Am I able to laugh at my own mistakes? YES/NO
  7. Do I like myself? YES/NO
  8. Do I think positively about myself most of the time? YES/NO
  9. Do I believe there is nothing about me that is loveable? YES/NO
  10. Do I change myself to make others like me? YES/NO


  1. Yes= 1 No= 2
  2. Yes= 1 No= 2
  3. Yes=2 No=1
  4. Yes=2 No=1
  5. Yes=2 No=1
  6. Yes= 1 No= 2
  7. Yes= 1 No= 2
  8. Yes= 1 No= 2
  9. Yes=2 No=1
  10. Yes=2 No=1

If you have a low score you have high self-esteem. If you have a high score you have a low self-esteem

Self-love strengthens self-esteem by increasing your self-worth and your self-confidence. By working with self-love in this area you will learn to love yourself exactly as you are, seeing the value in you. You begin to dampen the internal negative judges and ultimately come to a place of acceptance and valuing yourself. In a life with high self-esteem, you are free to enjoy the experiences in life without wasting your energy on talking yourself down.



  1. Do I need praise and positive feedback to feel great about myself? YES/NO
  2. Do I feel I am worth good things in life? YES/NO
  3. Do I feel successful? YES/NO
  4. Can I do things as well as other people? YES/NO
  5. Do I feel I can overcome a crisis? YES/NO
  6. Am I very critical of myself and my abilities? YES/NO
  7. Do I make decisions based on other people’s opinions? YES/NO
  8. Am I easily discouraged? YES/NO
  9. Do I believe I can reach my goals? YES/NO
  10. Do I feel like a strong person? YES/NO



  1. Yes=2 No=1
  2. Yes= 1 No= 2
  3. Yes= 1 No= 2
  4. Yes= 1 No= 2
  5. Yes= 1 No= 2
  6. Yes= 2 No=1
  7. Yes= 2 No=1
  8. Yes= 2 No=1
  9. Yes= 1 No= 2
  10. Yes= 1 No= 2


If you have a low score you have high self -power

If you have a high score you have a low self -power

Self -love strengthens self-power by empowering you. It creates resilience to handle challenges, belief in yourself to reach your goals and gives you strength and determination to continuously move forward in your life. Self-love work in relation to your self-power gives you an energy boost and a strength of spirit.



  1. Am I able to set clear personal boundaries? YES/NO
  2. Do I feel nervous when meeting strangers? YES/NO
  3. Do I find it easy to confront people? YES/NO
  4. Do I get nervous and unconfident when people criticise me? YES/NO
  5. Am I able to express my opinion easily? YES/NO
  6. Do my fears and inferiority stop me from doing what I want to do? YES/NO
  7. Do I feel I will succeed no matter what? YES/NO
  8. Do I need other people to make me feel safe? YES/NO
  9. Do I accept myself as I am? YES/NO
  10. Do I like to be alone? YES/NO


  1. Yes= 1 No= 2
  2. Yes= 2 No=1
  3. Yes= 1 No= 2
  4. Yes= 2 No=1
  5. Yes= 1 No= 2
  6. Yes= 2 No=1
  7. Yes= 1 No= 2
  8. Yes= 2 No=1
  9. Yes= 1 No= 2
  10. Yes= 2 No=1


If you have a low score you have high sense of security in your life. 

If you have a high score you have a low sense of security in your life

Self love strengthens your security by simply making you less insecure within yourself and of your abilities. You become self sufficient. When you can make yourself feel safe you do not need to rely on anyone else because you know you are always there for you. Self-love focusing on creating security gives you a powerful foundation to take on the world and feel contentment with your life.


So now you have an idea of why self-love is important in your life and hopefully which areas you want to focus upon. In the last month Re:Root has been focusing on the art of self love. Check out the links below to some of our most recent articles to find out how you can give yourself a much needed self-love boost today

HAve a beautiful week <3

#lifelesson101 – 9 steps to recreating your body image by honouring your body with self-love
#lifelessons101 – 5 incredibly powerful self love habits

An easy ABC guide to making self-love a daily practise

The 7 steps to Self love – the key to building a relationship with yourself.

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#life lessons 101 – 3 step process to take care of yourself and get things done when you are overwhelmed

Being an Entrepreneur can be overwhelming at time. Heck being human can be overwhelming at times too! No matter who you are some weeks are just harder than others and in the last week, I have been feeling overwhelmed by everything. And this feeling has some pretty nasty side effects if you allow them to run you ragged.

You know you are feeling overwhelmed when life is like a constant trip on the never-ending hamster wheel. The diary is full of things you have to do and you have no idea where the energy is going to come from. The smallest tasks become insanely difficult. The more you try the more you just want to curl up under the duvet and do nothing until it all goes away. And I am sure you know from experience At these times it’s easy to allow the negative feelings to take over. To feel nonproductive, useless, not as good as everyone else. The guilt cycle gets triggered and alongside the hamster wheel, the negative thought spiral creates a hurricane in your brain.  When you get there you are in the danger zone for a stress meltdown.

And the strange thing is that when we are in all of this mental and physical chaos the majority of us still carry on forging ahead in the storm. Why? Well, sometimes you have to. Students, for example, can’t get away from the exam deadlines. Brides can’t give up on the wedding plans when they have a month to go. And as an entrepaneur, you know the only way to succeed is to keep on going. So  when we are totally overwhelmed how can we stop hitting the meltdown danger zone whilst still carrying on?

Can it be done?


I have found a way to do exactly that. It’s a 3 step process that will get you through these times and bring you out the other side with the minimum of damage. With a little conscious awareness and a few actions you can and will get through this and this weekend is the perfect time to start.


There are things we have to do, need to do and want to do. And we only have 24 hours in the day. So in order to get stuff done, we have to minimise our expectations to get things to fit into the time we have. Minimising seems hard but it isn’t I promise you try this process

Hit the calendar – work out how long your busy period will be. Now in that period remove everything that is unessential. This does not mean just getting rid of the things you want to do. Delegate tasks that you have to do or postpone the non-immediate ones. Now look for some spaces where you can do self-care and block those in.

Use your spoons – if you are feeling overwhelmed you will have low energy. Spoons theory was created for patients with mental health challenges. However, I find that it is applicable to all of us. Especially when we are overwhelmed. The basic principle is that you have 10 spoons of energy in a day. You take 10 minutes to work out which are 1 spoon, 2 spoon, 3 spoon and 4 spoon tasks. So doing the washing might be a 3 spoon task, food shopping or work a 4 spoon task. Now the idea is that you have 10 spoons in one day. When you make your to-do list make do a quick analysis and allocate the spoons accordingly to your tasks.

So my day today looks like this:

  • Pædagogisk meeting – 2 spoons
  • Work – 4 spoons
  • Quick clean – 1 spoon
  • Washing 1 – spoon
  • Bbq with friends – 2 spoons

That’s all I can do. Anything else has to be either delegated or left for another day. It keeps my energy use in check. I also do the same process for work tasks and allow my self 10 work spoons for each work day. Using spoon theory minmises your day and will give you time to relax.

Routine routine routine- Follow a fixed routine for the weekly chores. Make a food plan for the week and shop once. Do your washing on the same day. Dedicate x amount of time to the children before bed. Force yourself into a routine and the chores will become habits. Then the habits take less of your energy and become easier to do.


When you are overwhelmed you need more than ever to recharge. So energising yourself where ever possible is really important. Eat well. Get your 7 – 8 hours sleep. Help your focus by using focus music. Do 10 minutes exercise or walkievery dayday. Give yourself blocks of time dedicated to self-care. That can be anything from a facemask, to a netflix binge. Anything that will give you a good amount of downtime. Make recharging a priority in these days and grab every opportunity for relaxation you can get. I know you might want to go out and party, or socialise every evening however if your body doesn’t work nothing will. Make taking care of you a priority when you are overwhelmed and you will have the energy to come out the otherside

Self-care and success

I love personal development and in a perfect world, I would have my hour a day dedicated to this. However, in the next 2 months, it’s just not an option. Yet without this, I don’t feel as though I am succeeding and growing in my life and my motivation and self-confidence goes downwards. The last thing I need in a period of overwhelmedness. A simple tool has really helped me to get over this problem. Everyday I ask myself:

  • How am I going to challenge myself today?
  • How am I going to take care of myself today?

I only dedicate one task as a challenge one task as self-care. Some days it can be as simple as go to work and read a book for 15 minutes, other days the actions are bigger. The success of achieving these two actions makes me feel as though I have climbed a gigantic mountain. Which is exactly the dopamine hit my tired and overwhelmed brain needs! Success is one of the best motivators. For me, this has been the best tool I have ever found to survive the feeling of being overwhelmed. Try this tool every day for a week and you will feel on top of the world!


When using this 3 step process you take charge. By taking charge you are in control. And that in itself stops the feeling of being overwhelmed. I recommend if you like me have a busy 6-8 week period coming up then please please book yourself a few days r and r at the end of it. Recoup and recharge and you will avoid the meltdown danger zone. Above all take care of yourself and be conscious of how you are treating you at this time.

Have a great weekend <3

How will you challenge yourself today_How will you take care of yourself today_.jpg