Make your own 7 day Summer  Challenge!

Summer holidays huzzah!! The perfect time to relax, kick back and challenge yourself! I can hear you saying “yes, yes and whhaaat!’ to that sentence. Normally Summer holidays are not associated with challenging yourself. The primary focus is self-care. And I completely agree we need this time to wind down and enjoy yourselves. However, the summer holidays are also the perfect time to try something new. And without the usual outside pressure factors on your schedule such as work or school the summer holidays is the most optimal time to start a new habit.

I love challenges. Especially in the summer as I am more carefree and less busy so I can indulge myself in them. At the same time, I don’t want my summer holidays to turn in to work so I have created the concept of the 7 day Summer Challenge. 7 days is not a long time but it is a time where you can begin something new and indulge in it without it becoming work. I have done all sorts of different 7-day summer challenges. They can be serious or silly. Last year I really wanted to change and expand my diet repertoire at the same time I wanted to sleep in. So I created the 7 days of brunch challenge. Quite simply I had to try a new recipe for brunch every day. Armed with my newly made Pin full of recipe ideas, each day I made my brunch and posted a pic on Fb to celebrate my achievements. It went down a storm and I had so much fun. This small 7-day challenge opened up new taste and culinary experiences and made me feel fantabulous. A wonderful way to celebrate my life and my holidays. (And yes I am doing it again this summer!)

There are billions of small challenges you can make into a 7-day summer challenge. So grab one of these ideas, make your own hashtag and throw yourself into celebrating the moment in a fun and inspiring way!  

 

7 days of brunch

– Seriously this one is so fun here is my Pin to give you some ideas

https://www.pinterest.dk/rerootyourlife/brunch-ideas-detox-and-vegetarian/

7 dates in 7 days

– Take yourself on 7 crazy dates (You can invite other people if you like). You don’t have to spend a lot of money to have a great date here are some ideas to get you started.

http://stylecaster.com/free-date-ideas/

 

7 days of amazing mornings

– Hal Elrod’s inspiring concept of The Miracle Morning one hour dedicated to your personal growth every day is even easier to start in the holidays. Of course, I recommend to do it every day but as a quick start, boost give yourself the 7-day challenge to start your day amazingly.

www.miraclemorning.com
7 days of something new-

What haven’t you done that you have always wanted to try? NOw is the time to do it. Choose a week and do something new every day

7 days of meditation

– Meditation we know feeds body and soul. Been having trouble keeping up your practice then use the summer downtime to cultivate the habit.

https://www.yogawakeup.com/single-post/2017/04/29/What-you%E2%80%99ll-notice-after-7-days-of-Meditation

7 days of self-care

– Invest in you and do something amazing for yourself every day for 7 days. This is pure pampering and you will feel sooo good and loved by the end of this challenge.

https://awesomealice.com/self-care-challenge/

7 days of a sustainable lifestyle

– Want a greener lifestyle and don’t know where to start? Try this challenge.  Basically for 7 days Eat. Move and Live Sustainably. This idea comes from the sustainability project 7 Days Challenge. Here is some info to inspire you:

http://sevendayschallenge.com/about

7 days of kindness

– Use your 7 days to make the world a nicer place by actively seeking and creating oppertunties to be kind.

https://chopra.com/articles/7-random-acts-of-kindness-in-7-days

7 days of exercise

– Take part in a different type of exercise everyday!

https://www.marieclaire.co.za/lifestyle/health-fitness/mc-tries-7-different-workouts-7-days

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The sky is your limit! What would you love to do for 7 days? Choose it.  Plan it. Do it. And share it! Remember to post your pics here and on the fb group of your #7daysummerchallenge 🙂

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#life lessons 101 – 3 step process to take care of yourself and get things done when you are overwhelmed

Being an Entrepreneur can be overwhelming at time. Heck being human can be overwhelming at times too! No matter who you are some weeks are just harder than others and in the last week, I have been feeling overwhelmed by everything. And this feeling has some pretty nasty side effects if you allow them to run you ragged.

You know you are feeling overwhelmed when life is like a constant trip on the never-ending hamster wheel. The diary is full of things you have to do and you have no idea where the energy is going to come from. The smallest tasks become insanely difficult. The more you try the more you just want to curl up under the duvet and do nothing until it all goes away. And I am sure you know from experience At these times it’s easy to allow the negative feelings to take over. To feel nonproductive, useless, not as good as everyone else. The guilt cycle gets triggered and alongside the hamster wheel, the negative thought spiral creates a hurricane in your brain.  When you get there you are in the danger zone for a stress meltdown.

And the strange thing is that when we are in all of this mental and physical chaos the majority of us still carry on forging ahead in the storm. Why? Well, sometimes you have to. Students, for example, can’t get away from the exam deadlines. Brides can’t give up on the wedding plans when they have a month to go. And as an entrepaneur, you know the only way to succeed is to keep on going. So  when we are totally overwhelmed how can we stop hitting the meltdown danger zone whilst still carrying on?

Can it be done?

Yes!

I have found a way to do exactly that. It’s a 3 step process that will get you through these times and bring you out the other side with the minimum of damage. With a little conscious awareness and a few actions you can and will get through this and this weekend is the perfect time to start.

Minimise

There are things we have to do, need to do and want to do. And we only have 24 hours in the day. So in order to get stuff done, we have to minimise our expectations to get things to fit into the time we have. Minimising seems hard but it isn’t I promise you try this process

Hit the calendar – work out how long your busy period will be. Now in that period remove everything that is unessential. This does not mean just getting rid of the things you want to do. Delegate tasks that you have to do or postpone the non-immediate ones. Now look for some spaces where you can do self-care and block those in.

Use your spoons – if you are feeling overwhelmed you will have low energy. Spoons theory was created for patients with mental health challenges. However, I find that it is applicable to all of us. Especially when we are overwhelmed. The basic principle is that you have 10 spoons of energy in a day. You take 10 minutes to work out which are 1 spoon, 2 spoon, 3 spoon and 4 spoon tasks. So doing the washing might be a 3 spoon task, food shopping or work a 4 spoon task. Now the idea is that you have 10 spoons in one day. When you make your to-do list make do a quick analysis and allocate the spoons accordingly to your tasks.

So my day today looks like this:

  • Pædagogisk meeting – 2 spoons
  • Work – 4 spoons
  • Quick clean – 1 spoon
  • Washing 1 – spoon
  • Bbq with friends – 2 spoons

That’s all I can do. Anything else has to be either delegated or left for another day. It keeps my energy use in check. I also do the same process for work tasks and allow my self 10 work spoons for each work day. Using spoon theory minmises your day and will give you time to relax.

Routine routine routine- Follow a fixed routine for the weekly chores. Make a food plan for the week and shop once. Do your washing on the same day. Dedicate x amount of time to the children before bed. Force yourself into a routine and the chores will become habits. Then the habits take less of your energy and become easier to do.

Energise

When you are overwhelmed you need more than ever to recharge. So energising yourself where ever possible is really important. Eat well. Get your 7 – 8 hours sleep. Help your focus by using focus music. Do 10 minutes exercise or walkievery dayday. Give yourself blocks of time dedicated to self-care. That can be anything from a facemask, to a netflix binge. Anything that will give you a good amount of downtime. Make recharging a priority in these days and grab every opportunity for relaxation you can get. I know you might want to go out and party, or socialise every evening however if your body doesn’t work nothing will. Make taking care of you a priority when you are overwhelmed and you will have the energy to come out the otherside

Self-care and success

I love personal development and in a perfect world, I would have my hour a day dedicated to this. However, in the next 2 months, it’s just not an option. Yet without this, I don’t feel as though I am succeeding and growing in my life and my motivation and self-confidence goes downwards. The last thing I need in a period of overwhelmedness. A simple tool has really helped me to get over this problem. Everyday I ask myself:

  • How am I going to challenge myself today?
  • How am I going to take care of myself today?

I only dedicate one task as a challenge one task as self-care. Some days it can be as simple as go to work and read a book for 15 minutes, other days the actions are bigger. The success of achieving these two actions makes me feel as though I have climbed a gigantic mountain. Which is exactly the dopamine hit my tired and overwhelmed brain needs! Success is one of the best motivators. For me, this has been the best tool I have ever found to survive the feeling of being overwhelmed. Try this tool every day for a week and you will feel on top of the world!

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When using this 3 step process you take charge. By taking charge you are in control. And that in itself stops the feeling of being overwhelmed. I recommend if you like me have a busy 6-8 week period coming up then please please book yourself a few days r and r at the end of it. Recoup and recharge and you will avoid the meltdown danger zone. Above all take care of yourself and be conscious of how you are treating you at this time.

Have a great weekend <3

How will you challenge yourself today_How will you take care of yourself today_.jpg

 

 

 

 

#Lifelessons101- Create community for yourself and combat loneliness

I am an expert at moving. Seriously. In 24 years I have lived at 50 odd different addresses in 4 countries. (Somewhere in my blood the wanderer gene is strong, my Grannie was just the same). The challenge however with moving around so much is of course loneliness. Not only are you constantly moving leaving friends and being further away from them, you are also challenged by finding new friends in your new life. Loneliness is on the increase, not just in the world wanderer community but in your workplace, in your apartment building and on your street. World wide we are feeling lonelier in general. In the 70s about 11-20% of America felt lonely in 2010 it was 45%. It’s a modern epidemic.

Now we could go into a conversation about why are people lonelier today however that is not the life lesson I learnt this week. (Well re:learnt). This week my life lesson was about curing loneliness by building community. We need community. Humans essentially need tribes. We need to be accepted and supported and we need to be able to do this for others. However I know, first hand, how challenging it can be to find our tribe, our people when feeling isolated and alone. Yet what my experience has taught me is that we can create the community we need for ourselves no matter where we are in the world if we are brave enough to do it.

Let me give you an example. In August 2016 I moved to Jutland. Once again I was moving away from a network of amazing people, colleagues and friends and heading into the unknown to live with my beloved Mr T. You would think that moving in with a partner would be enough to combat loneliness but it’s not.  (And in fact it can often damage a relationship). Knowing this I put a plan into action to help me create a new community and network in my new local area. I reached out to find the kind of people I want in my life. I started by going back to school. That was not the greatest experience when it came to the people. I found a few that I could relate to and started to build relationships with them. But I needed more so I joined a belly dance class with some amazing and wonderful women. Yet that wasn’t enough. I sat down and realised I missed close connections with both women and men that shared similar life values and also were spiritually on a similar level to me. So I hit facebook and made a few groups. I began a women’s circle in the local library, not knowing if anyone would show up. I organised a few nights playing games at our house and invited people I didn’t know very well but I knew liked to game.And slowly over this last year I have began to find the friendships I was looking for. Result I am not lonely and I have a community around me, the beginnings of a new tribe.

Now I am not telling you that it was easy. It was scary. It was daunting. And I wanted to hide under my duvet alot. However by identifying what I needed and then kicking myself up the butt to create it I have in a short time created the cure for my own potential loneliness. Now I know this is potentially easier to do if you move to a new area than in an area you already live in, it depends on who you are as a person. However I have built a strategy for anyone who is feeling lonely and is fed up with it. If you are sick and tired of feeling lonely and want to do something about it I have a recipe for you to follow. It takes a little patience, trial and error and a dollop of bravery. However with these six steps you can create the community you need.

Step 1: What kind of community do you want?

Before you go out and find/ create a community for yourself you need to know what you want. This is a time for introspection. What kind of friends do you want? What kind of things will they like? What kind of personalities will they have? Brainstorm personal qualities, hobbies, lifestyle choices your friends will make.  Also brainstorm your interests and the things you like to do. You want friends who want to do similar things to you. Shared experiences create bonds, friendships and make life fun.

Step 2: Who do you have already?

Get out Facebook and scroll through your friends. Who do you have in your network that already embodies these things? Make a list. Do the same with your work colleagues, people you vaguely know but seem interesting to you. Now check your list to see why don’t you have a stronger relationship with these people? Remove anyone from the list who you really don’t want to have a better relationship with. Now brainstorm how you could contact these people and ways you can connect with them.

**Remember** something I always say to clients who feel alone is that you don’t have to wait for people to contact you. If you want people in your life you have to reach out to them.

Step 3: Contact them

Call, sms, facebook, email there are so many ways to connect. Choose one and do it contact one of the people on your list. Ask them how they are suggest an activity you could do together and ask when they could do it. Choose something you and they might find fun. Don’t worry if they say no this time. Very often fear of rejection is what stops us inviting people out or over. If you make up your mind that you won’t ask because the other person will reject you then you haven’t really given them a chance to choose and that is not fair. If they say no remember its NOTHING to do with you. Other people have their own lives and they are equally busy. A rejection doesn’t mean they don’t like you, it just means not now. Keep working on building the relationship with them and contact someone else to do something with.

Step 4: Create the friends you don’t have yet.

When I was living in Copenhagen I realised I had noone in my circle who wanted to work on their personal development or improving the world. As I was becoming a life coach. I wanted friends who were environmentally conscious, lived conscious proactive and spiritual lives and would inspire me to do the same. I actively went looking for places where these kind of people hung out and eventually found Tinkuy a spiritual fitness center in Copenhagen bursting with people wanting to grow themselves and contribute to the world.

So if none of your existing network embodies the qualities you brainstormed then you have to go hunting. I would recommend signing up for a class or a group. I have joined art classes, viking reenactment groups, meditation and dance classes when consciously looking for new friends. Others I know are involved with voluntary organisations, politics or have simply joined a school parent teachers council. What are you interested in? Let your interests guide you to finding new friends. Eventually you will meet someone you think is interesting and then identify the activity you would like to do and ask them to do it with you. (Basically repeat step 3 with the new person).

Step 5: Creating opportunities to meet like minded people

This one is challenging. However if you dare it can be really rewarding. Basically if you can’t find a locale group, club, event that you want to go to then start your own. After 6 months of living in Jutland I found myself seriously in need once again of female friends that made personal development, spirituality or improving the world part of their everyday lives. So I went online and did some googling. NOthing. Then one day I found a video from the Global sisterhood about starting a women’s circle. So I signed up as a local group co-ordinator. Found somewhere free to hold it. Set up a facebook group and shared my event everywhere I could think of. I even put up posters. I had no idea if anyone would show up. I just had to trust the universe that I had made the space and they would come. And they did. Now we have a tight circle of inspirational women supporting each other and beginning to build some wonderful friendships.

Starting a circle or a club is relatively easy. Decide what it’s about, find somewhere  to do it and get going. Facebook is great for this. Making or joining an online group and then arranging a meet up is one of the easiest ways to do it. I have joined and created some online communities as well as the physical ones to help with the loneliness and to connect with people who share the same interests and morals as I do. And it is so rewarding if you are brave enough to dare.

Step 6: Be open, look for opportunities and dare

The biggest kit in your toolkit for curing loneliness is being open to new possibilities and daring to take them. Maintain your friendships. Feed your relationships by making them important. Look for opportunities to try new things and dare to do it. Create opportunities to talk to new people. If you struggle to start conversations with strangers then plan some conversation openers. Personally I find complementing something clothes, something they said at a meeting. Dare to try and dare to fail. Don’t let rejection get you down. Not everyone in the world is the friend you are looking for. However with 7.5 billion people in the world there are a lot of options out there so if one attempt doesn’t work try again. The more you do the easier it gets.

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This may sound harsh but being lonely is a choice. You can choose to let it take over or you can take conscious steps to not be lonely. I know it’s hard to take the steps, to stop the negative voices and fears ruling your head. However it is your life. No-one gave those voices and fears permission to be the experts. They are not right. You are loveable, fun to be with and someone does want to be your friend. You have 7.5 billion chances in the world to make a friend so go for it. It really is simple. Reach out. Create the community you need and by doing that you will also give someone else the opportunity to be a little less lonely too.

Have a happy weekend <3

Community is Selv Care forlonliness

 

If you or someone you know needs support then why not buy Re:root’s  holistic coaching voucher to get support and inspiration to create an amazing life. Check it out here!

 

 

 

Inspire me!

I have EXCITING news…..

In 2018 I am launching Re:root’s very own personal development radio program and youtube channel : Re:root Your Life!!

and I need YOU to inspire me!

I don’t just want to make my programs about me telling you what I think you need to do to grow as a person and create a conscious, powerful amazing life.

I want YOU to tell me what YOU want to know in order to create a life you love?

What is it that you like to be inspired about? 

How do you want to grow in 2018?

I have an abundance of personal development experience and tools from my holistic life coaching and workshops that have and will improve the quality of people’s lives.

Inspire me to help you by writing in the comments about the personal development advice you want to create the life you imagine.

You can also send it to me by email re.rootej@gmail.com

Thank you for helping me to support you to grow an amazing life in 2018 <3′

How do youwant to growin 2018 _.jpg

The secret inspiration for committing to action – Mondays!

Happy 2018! I love the new year don’t you? For me January brings with it the inspiration for possibility. In the mid winter mid spring time of year, January gives a hint of the good that is about to come when the spring returns. Kind of nature’s spoiler if you like.  Especially as today when I look out of my window the pale, golden light, blue skies and frost dapple grass gives me a inspiration boost everytime I look outside. Even the air smells fresher! And although it was madness considering the temperatures here in Jutland I even opened the window for an hour to fill my office with the smell, spring is on it’s way.  

However if like me you do get caught up in the inspiration of the new year, you have probably started, or nearly started to commit to actions, new year’s resolutions and plans for the new you in the new year. It all seems so easy to do at this time of year right? New beginnings are around us , new calendars on our desks with empty pages and unlimited potential. It’s great. However often you might find that with all that potential once january has passed that the inspiration light for the new you, or the new goals starts to dim in February, drivel into non existent in March and by April is as real and tangible as the Easter bunny. And why is that?

Well there are many articles out there explaining this phenomenon. However summed up generally the  main challenge is committing to action. No, no, don’t run away I’m not trying to make you feel bad about it – honestly. It is easy to commit to a lifestyle change when it is all new and shiny (don’t I know that one, I have a stack of old diaries and unfulfilled goals to prove it!) The challenge is on the grey days, when the world is grey, miserable, the to do list is never ending and you naturally retreat to the duvet. It’s understandable, technically it’s primitively natural. I digress. The point I am attempting to make is that in order to commit and to keep committed to a lifestyle change maybe what we need is a constant inspiration boost to keep us on track. Kind of an all year round January feeling. Just imagine if every day or at least every week felt as inspiring as the start of the new year wouldn’t it be so amazingly easy to stick to our resolutions? Of course it would.

Now unlike in the movies blue fairies with fix it wands and happy chirpy animal helpers don’t pop up whenever we need an inspiration (and if they did I am sure we would all prioritize our desires a little differently). As is always true if we want a job done properly we have to do it ourselves. And luckily the gods (well it might have been the romans or the greeks actually )gave us a gift perfectly designed to help us with maintaining our inspiration levels. Wait for it… it’s MONDAYS!

No I kid you not. Monday is un-advertise hidden January we need. Monday is the start of every week. Fact. The day before Monday is hopefully a day of rest. Same as January.  9 times out of 10 Monday is the start of a fresh week with no mistakes in it. Now Monday’s often get a bad rap. The ugh back to work day after a free weekend. However if seen from a different perspective Monday can also be an exciting new beginning. You maybe thinking yeah right however I speak to you as an ex-monday hater and yey-monday convert. For me monday brings the January inspiration with it 99% of the time. I love Mondays. From shifting my perspective and with a few conscious habit changes Monday now brings me closer to my goals than any other day of the week. Monday actually supports me to commit to whatever it is I need to or want to commit to. Shockingly Monday now makes life much more enjoyable and my commitment to action more dedicated. And that has been the same in a dead end job, in education and as an entrepreneur.

So how to do this? How do you take Monday’s and turn them around to becoming one of the best tools supporting you to commit to action and make the lifestyle changes you dreamed of on New Year’s Eve? Here’s my guide to making Monday’s become as inspiring as January – enjoy!

Positive from the word go!

Start your Monday positively. No matter what. Stand up out of bed and tell the world “Today is going to be a great day!” I mean it. Out loud. Hands on hips. In pjs or your birthday suit, shout it out to the world. You will feel daft at first however after a few tries it becomes fun and a great mood lifter to start any day.

Plan before you peek

(Nothing rude here I promise.) Instead of turning on the phone, checking Facebook or your emails first thing in the morning, check in with yourself first. Don’t give the excuse you don’t have the time. All you need is five minutes to plan your week, see where you will make time for your goals and yourself and then get on with it. I once read that when we check our emails first thing in the morning we risk not doing what we want to do but what someone else wants us to do. I tried it and it’s true. On the days I opened mails last I was in control of my day. Open them first and I was bogged down by everyone else all day. Lesson learned. Be in charge of your day and your week, after all it’s your life!

(Oh and don’t let your planning take more than 10 minutes. 10 minutes planning is ample to kick start your week and then get off an go and do your week. 10% planning 90% action is always the best policy.)

Evaluate last week

Look back over your progress last week and see how it was going with your goals, your life. Basically check in with yourself. Drop the guilt about what you didn’t do and look at what you need to do. If you got demotivated or off track last week, what is it you can feel you need to get back your inspiration? Identify what you need and implement it as soon as humanly possible. If in doubt I highly recommend the kitchen disco as a winner. Stupidly loud Abba (insert cheesy band of choice) and boogie will bring your energy up whenever you need it. Inspiration after all is just a raising of your energy.

 

Have a success experience

 

To keep committed and inspired we need to succeed. Set goals for yourself on the monday that are achievable and measurable. Today I have writing this article, do the washing and plan my business year. So far two out of three and it’s not 17:00 yet- Go Me! If in doubt I always fall back on washing clothes, I love emptying the basket and throwing it in the machine. Achievable no matter where my energy is at. I have a friend who cleans for a success experience. We are much more motivated when we feel successful so make yourself succeed at something on a Monday.

Clean the slate and then do

Monday is the day to clean the slate. As a child I always loved the Anne of Green Gables quote “Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes in it”. Monday is a great time to remember this. You cannot change last week. It is over. The only thing you have control over is your now. So do something. However big or small (actually preferably small) do something today that is a step towards your lifestyle change. If you do something every monday you are going to eventually make that change.

 

Mondays can be magical. It really is your choice. On Mondays you can decide to make more effort than any other day of the week to start out in the right way and give yourself the inspiration you need to commit – be your own blue farie. Now I am aware that some of you maybe have a different day when your week starts. That day is your weekly January. Using these five steps will keep your motivation and make it easier to commit to action every week and by July you will find that you are still on track with your new year’s resolutions . With the added bonus of a guaranteed, inspiring, effective and fantastic day once a week. Who wouldn’t love that!

Let me know in the comments how you have turned your mondays around

Have a great week, re:root in yourself and enjoy your journey!

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Kick start your 2018 with my Holistic life coaching January offer– available until January 31st only !!

Kick start 2018

Put self development on pause this holiday

So now it’s 14 days until Christmas and it’s at this point every year my own personal development focus used to fly out the window with everything else there is to do.  And although some gurus would disagree with me I have now learnt to say that’s totally ok. My logic is that there is so much else going on that if you added on top of all of that new habits, new goals, new activities you are actually going to set yourself up for a fail and not succeed. This is a seriously busy time of year. Growing and challenging ourselves is already on the cards for most family christmases. You don’t need to pressure yourself even more.  

Yet if you like me are a personal development junkie, how can you press the pause button for a couple of weeks at christmas and allow yourself to slow down on your personal growth, without getting so distracted you forget to continue again after the holidays? From experience I have found there are 3 golden rules to follow at this time of year to help you to do exactly that.

Keep doing what you are doing- within reason

As much as is humanly possible keep doing the good things you are already doing for yourself. Whether it is a self love mantra, or a miracle morning routine keep going. However within reason. If your schedule is so busy in this last run up to the holidays then try and cut back on the unnecessary activities. And that’s all not just your personal development activities but on all activities that you don’t need to do. Strip back your normal routine to the bare essentials and give yourself the time you need.

Self care and hygge

Make self care and hygge (see life lesson 101 on the art of hygge  )a priority in these 14 days. By taking care of yourself, taking time to be cosy and relax you will still be working on your personal development by practising self love. And you will be in harmony with nature’s rhythm, the natural rhythm right now is slowing down and hibernation. When we work in harmony with the season we feel better. So enjoy your duvet on the sofa evenings, a face mask or a night with an old favourite film. Even though you are technically not primarily focused on your personal development right now you will grow naturally by listening to your bodies needs.

Give yourself a Christmas present

Seriously buy yourself a present however I don’t mean any old thing. Give yourself a present of inspiration, to help refocus you on your personal development journey after the holiday. There are many ways to do this from cheap to expensive. The main thing you need to remember is to set a start date after the holidays and clearly define your goal. The idea behind this present to yourself is that it brings you new inspiration for how you would like to continue your personal development journey in the new year.

I have 3 recommendations for your personal development present to yourself this Christmas

  • Set a goal to watch a Ted Talk/ personal development video everyday during the holiday.  (I find collecting them on a pinterest board helps me to store these gems away until after Christmas – here is mine)
  • Give yourself a new personal development book and when reading it over the holidays underline the things you want to begin practising after the holiday. (See my favourite list here)  
  • Book yourself into a personal development workshop or time with a life coach in the new year.  (Re:Root has a gift certificate for a coaching session in the new year- check it out here).

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Two of the most important things we can do in life is to be conscious of our actions and to live in the moment. By allowing yourself to consciously put your personal development on pause for Christmas, focus on self care and by setting a goal for when and how your will restart your development journey again you will be giving yourself the chance to live in your now and appreciate your christmas with the people you love the most, completely refreshed for the new year! And isn’t that the ultimate Christmas present of all.

Have wonderful week <3

Be kind to yourself this Christmas

 

From disbelief to manifesting your dreams

Being an entrepreneur is exciting, creative and inspirational, yet sometimes it can be challenging. One of my favourite quotes in life is “It is not enough to have a dream if I am not willing to pursue it.” I hold this as a core and central mantra. I pursue my dreams with my heart, body and soul. However lately as I have been working, creating and manifesting my dreams, the people who care for me have been raising concerns. It comes down to this. They think I am taking on too much. That I might not be able to do the things it takes to manifest my dreams.  That I can’t do what it is I want to do. In short they can’t see the vision I can and they are concerned for my well being. Although well meant, their concerns have became an increasing source of irritation and frustration for me. I felt as though no-one believed in me, that their limiting beliefs were limiting my possibilities. Like I was the only person on the planet that could see my potential. Do you know that feeling? It’s hella de-motivating ain’t it. Especially when disbelief comes from your own internal doubts.

Infact let’s be honest, it’s more than demotivating. It can feel almost vampiric in the amount of energy in how other peoples disbelief drains you. Two things happen. Either you believe them and lose all belief in yourself. Or you fight it (as I used to) and use too much of your energy trying to get them to believe in you. Either reaction is exhausting. And in the worse case scenario, their seemingly lack of belief in you means, that you don’t put everything into making your dreams and you end up giving up altogether. Yey way to go loved ones you crushed my dreams! Or at least that’s how you can view it if you like to play victim.

I don’t. I believe that everything in life is trying to teach us something. And after the universe had sent 6 people, all close to me, to say “hey are you sure you can do this?” I decided that instead of reacting in the two traditional ways,  I would take the third option. Respond. Find the teaching. The gift of learning from their non belief and the teaching of their concerns. All at once their concerns became an opportunity to really find out if I could make my dream a reality in a very practical way. I am now more certain than ever I can achieve my dreams because now I have looked and KNOW how I can do it.  Because of this process  I now know that if someone else asks me “Can you really do this?” I can answer with a confident “YES!”  It also had the extremely beneficial effect of silencing my own internal doubts in my abilities because I now know what I can do and how I am going to do it.

If you are in a situation where you have a dream that you want to pursue and someone doesn’t believe you can do it (even if that someone is you,) follow my process for turning disbelief into a belief and you will discover how you can manifest your dreams.  

Accept the gift

First things first accept the gift. You have to see the disbelief as a teaching gift and opportunity to learn. You have to do this to free up the energy and motivation inside yourself to find out how you are going to do what you want to do. If your emotions are frustrated and irritated you won’t be able to find the teachings. Mentally, or even physically thank them for their concern and caring for you. After all they are trying to help.

Find the why

Why are they concerned? Ask them. Maybe they can in their objective position see something you can’t. It doesn’t have to be something that will stop you manifesting your dream. It could just be something you haven’t thought of that you need to factor in. This is seriously useful to be made aware of. So find out why they are concerned for you and again be grateful for the fresh perspective they are giving you.

Take on the realism glasses

Look at your dream. Really look. Not through the rose tinted glasses but through the realism glasses. What will it take for you to create it? Brainstorm this. See each step of the creation process.  And then take a step back and look at it. Ask yourself if this is realistic? What will need to change in my life to create this? What am I willing to change in order to manifest my dream and what am I not willing to change?

For example: One of my dreams is that I want to create a better steady income doing something I love. However in order to create that steady income I was going to have to have a period of building up my business. The reality was I would have to become a lot better to sticking to a budget than I am currently am.  I was willing to go self employed however I knew that I would need to get professional advice to create a realistic budget and a fixed income from a part-time job to build up my business steadily. I didn’t want to have a part-time job, and if for a few years if that’s what it takes, then that’s what it takes.

Know what you can and can’t do

In order to believe you can create you dream you need to know what you can and can’t do. You will already have a toolbox of skills and some you need to gain. Write a list of what you can do and what you can’t do. On the can’t do side if there is something there you need to manifest your dreams how can you get the help you need? Do you need to be educated? Can you call in specialist help? Do you know someone already in your network who can help you with this? Turn those can’ts into cans by finding a solution.

And keep adding to your I can list. It will boost your self confidence. So read it whenever you need a reminder of how talented and clever you are.

Answer their concerns

Now look at each concern. Write them down. Respond to each one. Relate back to your skills and your realist understanding of how to manifest your dreams. Use this process as a secondary reality check list.  If you have investigated all of their concerns and do your research you will be able to  answer their concerns with facts and knowledge. Most people’s concerns are often about potential emergencies so this is a great way to cover your back, especially if your dream means a dramatic lifestyle change.

Make a plan

By now you should have a really great idea of exactly what it’s going to take to manifest your dream. This gives you a great foundation for planning out the steps you need to take to create your dream. Make a plan. Keep it realistic. Overestimate the time you will need to manifest it. This is going to be your guidebook to making your dreams come true. Make it detailed. Also be honest with yourself. If there is anything on that plan you doubt you can do or are unsure if it is realistic make it real. So for example if you want to set up your own marketing business but are unsure if you know enough about accounting then include getting an accountant or financial advice into your plan.

Plan your response

Now it’s time to go back to the beginning. Plan your response for when people raise concerns. This is not so much to defend yourself it is a really useful tool for gainig clarity . It make you 100% clear in your own mind that you know what you are doing and how you are going to do it.

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This process is great for insights and clarity into manifesting you dreams, as well as transforming disbelief into belief. Of course you can’t plan for every eventuality along the path of manifesting your dreams. Minor hiccups and massive unseen opportunities will always turn up. However if you have worked through this process you will be prepared and confident. Two of the major ingredients of success. Isn’t it amazing how irritation, frustration and disbelief can be a great gift in manifesting our dreams. It just takes changing our perspective to looking for the teaching and choosing to respond with positive, determined action. In a way the process brings us full circle because when you know what you have to do and how you are going to do it actually empowers you to pursue your dreams

Enjoy chasing your dreams this week <3

Believe in your

 

 

My 6 steps to living a connected, conscious and happy life that you will love

One of the benefits of living abroad is that despite of spending long periods of time away from the people and places we love the most, when we finally get to see them it is possible to see the growth and changes that have taken place in them and ourselves much easier than if we saw them day to day.  Distance gives us the benefit of objective perspective.

This autumn I appreciated the benefit of such perspective when I  visited a place and some of the people I love most in the world after a long break. Not only was it great to catch up, I repeatedly heard “wow you are so strong and grounded now” (something we all though I wouldn’t be when I lived in this community over 11 years ago). I felt my own strength through their observations. I felt grounded. I felt powerful. I realised that I am living a conscious, connected and happy life. I mean that’s what I have been aiming at right, and when I was with these darling people I knew that all my efforts are truly working and that I am blossoming into my own potential. It felt great.

And it got me thinking about how was it I started this change, this evolution inside me? In essence what was it that I shifted in order to allow myself to grow? Big questions which have, as it turns out, fairly simple answers. If you are at the stage right now where you are thinking I want that kind of shift in me, I want to change my life and live a life of power here are some of the initial things I did to begin on this journey of the conscious and connected lifestyle that I love today.

Taking responsibility

The biggest shift I had to make, anyone has to make, to live consciously and powerfully is to take responsibility for themselves. You simply cannot live consciously and powerfully when you live in a victim mindset. Through the eyes of the “poor little me” mindset everything happens to you, nothing is your fault and you are powerless to change your circumstances. Understanding truly that we are responsible for our lives, what happens in them and the way we respond to the events around us is to be empowered. When we understand that we create our experience in life we get the freedom of choice, the choice to create the experience we want.

It took me many years to understand this until the final aha moment where the penny dropped and I got it. So do get put off if takes you too long to get it. Jim Carey gave a great speech on youtube explore this idea further, our intention creating our experience, check it out for inspiration

The past is in the past

We all have a past. Be it good, or bad, or both. However it is simply the past. Unchangeable and over. When moved to a new country I had the horrible experience of discovering that when you leave everything you know your emotional baggage is still there. Sometimes shouting louder than ever before as there is little to distract it and a lot of new uncertainties to stimulate old wounds. It was all down to the way I told my personal narrative. The stories we tell define us, become us if we lt them. If we keep mentioning the past then that makes it part of our present. Reliving past hurts makes them current in your present. Consider the stories you tell about yourself when you meet a stranger, who do you tell yourself, and them, that you are?  

You have to accept your past. And accept that you cannot change it. Logically there is nothing you can do about what has happened only what does happen. When we accept that our past is over and put it in its rightful place behind us, we can begin to live in our now.

Asking questions

Analysing what is happening in your life. Allowing the understanding that everything has a teaching for us if we look for it makes every part of life more conscious. When life hurls something at you ask questions such as “why did I create this?” or “what is the teaching here?” will empower you to respond rather than react. Looking for teachings helps you understand yourself so much better. We have a saying at home with us “if you understand it you can do something about it”. Understanding and learning are both essential parts of maintaining a connected conscious lifestyle.

Daring to fail

Daring to fail, is daring to do. Nothing is more powerful than taking the first step and then the next. If you don’t dare to fail at something you don’t give yourself the opportunity to grow. And the great thing is if you do fail it is not the end of the world, it is another opportunity to grow. Mistakes after all, are teaching gifts. Use those gifts, learn and then dare again.

Knowing,  loving and being true to yourself

This is a HUGE part of the process. In order to live a conscious and connected lifestyle you have to know yourself, know what is truly important to yourself. There is no point in throwing yourself out into a yoga retreat just because it is supposed to be good for you when you inner you prefers to play ice hockey and gets a healthy buzz and connection doing just that.  Walk your own talk, noone elses. Holding your integrity and living your truth is a major part of having a satisfying life where you respect yourself.

And love yourself as you are. (I know massively huge journey for many of us however the principle holds true). If you can’t love a part of yourself see if you can find out why and what you need to do in order to love that part of you. Then do it. Theoretical thinking, soul searching  is all well and good, however without the support of practical action you won’t get much further in your process. Take the time to connect with yourself as often as you can. I know there are kids, career and other things clamoring for your attention however if you can’t take care of yourself and take the time to love yourself, you cannot do your best in all the areas of life.

Loving the journey

There is no end goal in life. Well unless you count the one where you are in a box. Your life is right here, right now. Life is a journey so make sure you enjoy it. Obviously creating your perfect life will help you do that but in the meantime it is equally important to love your life now too. Enjoy the small things. They are the infrastructure of a strong and powerful life. Practise gratitude. Celebrate successes no matter if they are big or small. And make memories as often as you can. After all when we make it into that box who wants to think I didn’t make time to appreciate and enjoy my journey. Cat Stevens summed it up perfectly “We are only dancing on this earth for a short time” so dance and enjoy. Happiness is a choice we get to make and who wouldn’t rather have a happy life.

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Now all of these mindsets and actions don’t come overnight, or even in the short time it has taken you to read this article. They need to be practised over and over again to become natural to us. I still struggle to maintain them. A burnt ruiner lasagna I made for a party was my most recent challenge. However being aware of these choices in our mindset and our actions creates an experience of life that is connected and conscious and mostly rewarding. I love my life, all its ups and downs, small moments and teachings.  Most of all I love the opportunities I have created to continuously blossom and evolve being the strongest Emma I can be. I know that you have the power within you to do just the same.

Have a wonderful week <3

Happiness isa concious choice

 

 

Personal development and lifelong learning is an act of self love (4 min read)

Personal growth is easy when we are young, I mean biology is on our side, so is society, As a child we are literally bombarded with opportunities to learn from kindergarden, school, after school clubs, libraries, museums even summer camps. Our physical and cognitive development is constantly challenged to evolve and how fortunate we are in that. But once we reach adulthood learning, growing and developing becomes our own responsibility and that is often where our development stops. Ironic really when you think science with all of it’s ologists (psychologists etc) has proven that lifelong learning and personal development is a necessary part of mental and physical health. Our cognitive skills can keep developing even as we mature. The brain after all is a muscle and we all know the more we use a muscle the stronger it becomes. Personal development and lifelong learning improves our mental well being. It is in fact (although rarely thought of as such) an act of self love

No one I have ever met knew this better than my Grannie. She died at the grand age of 103 with all of her mental capacities in full function many years after her physical body failed her. While she could she travelled, she read, maintained a voluminous correspondence, she went to lectures (and I mean geology and archeology), gardened and loved her documentaries. She improved her brain constantly and consciously. I remember her saying it was important to keep the brain growing, to keep learning in life to maintain a good quality of life. And she really did. I am certain that if she had been my generation personal development would have been something she would have wholeheartedly embraced and participated in. The point being is that my Grannie born in 1912 was onto something important. If we don’t make the time to cultivate ourselves and grow then we and our quality of life will only wither and deteriorate.

I have met people, and been one of those people, who both doesn’t have time to invest in self love and self growth and boy is the deterioration obvious. Personally my brain felt foggy, I felt stupid and I kept making the same mistakes in my life over and over again. Until I invested in myself. Making me important enough to care for by motivating myself to grow and learn. I can feel the benefits. I am turning 40 soon (the point of cognitive decline apparently) yet I know through the self love I give myself of learning and growing as a person I will continue to evolve mentally and reap the benefits of that growth. And the great part is that in today’s world the opportunities for us as adults to learn and grow are both plenty and easily accessible. We just have to make ourselves important enough to grasp those opportunities.

Over the last few years I have really dedicated the time to this journey of self love, lifelong learning and self development. Am I perfect- hell no! Am I learning – everyday. If you want to focus on giving yourself this self love and care opportunity, even with a hectic schedule here are some of the things I do that might help you on your way.

Ted Talks

Oh how I love these. Short enough for those us with limited time, topics for every taste and always a positive experience. I aim to watch one everyday during breakfast or when I have to commute. A great and easy way to learn something new, provoke a new habit or action.

Personal development gurus

There are literally hundreds out there. However again university youtube gives you access to all of them. As do audio books, ebooks and the traditional paperback ( my favourite). Thousands of hours of other people’s lives and learning out there for you to access and grow from. I  read one personal development book for at least 10 minutes everyday. This way  I can read at least 6 personal development books a year. It doesn’t take a huge chunk of my life and yet it gives me so much.

Brain gym

Do you remember the fad for brain training products a few years back? Ok well at least 10 years ago. These guys (although got into law suites for bad advertising campaigns) had a good idea. Now whether or not the health benefits they promised are true, my own opinion is that brain workouts such as sudoku, crosswords puzzles, rubik cube or even mindfulness colouring books all increase the brain’s cognitive activity which will exercise that big old muscle. Again easy to do whilst commuting, in lunch breaks and after the kids are asleep. I like to do colouring when I am watching some netflixs on evenings where I just need to wind down and get re-energised.

Journal

Whenever you can in moments of stress, happiness, or just for 5 mins everyday, write. On a computer or in a notebook. Allow your thoughts to stream out and clear your minds. A clear mind has space for new information so write, write, write.

Get a new or improve an existing skill

Not rocket science to figure out how this works. Applying for cpd training at work (continuous personal development) solves a time issue for studying. Or if you want to go all out there are evening schools, online courses and universities. You don’t even have to go down the education route. Documentaries are a really good way of learning new stuff in a short space of time. I love the Crash Course series on youtube and of course the networks are bursting with options. Wether it’s career orientated, or pleasure oriented there is so much info out there which you can access in a way that fits your life.

And of course you can always learn something new, hobbies are a great way of challenging yourself to grow. These days youtube, google and pin interest not to mention thousands of online forums, make it so much easier to try a new hobby. I have in the last 7 years both learnt a new language and been back to school for a year to do an education in that language, as well as re started my belly dancing. This year I am already signed up for two new courses one career related and one to support my own personal development.

It is never too late to teach an old dog new tricks, my Grannie is proof of that.  Write a list of the things you always wanted to learn whether it’s waterskiing or patchwork and then choose something that fits your time and your budget and go for it.

Get physical, get outside

Not only does your brain need input and challenges, it also needs oxygen and blood pumping to it. I am the world’s worst at doing exercise or training  (at the moment) however I found gardening helps me to move and get outside. Also going for walks. Or scouring the local area for places to visit. New things, new sights are wonderful for mind body and soul. And if you can’t afford a holiday every year finding fun adventures where ever you live makes life more fun and more active.

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There are many, many ways to give yourself the self love of personal development and lifelong learning. They don’t have to be big major habit changing things, sometimes just a decision to prioritize yourself and one simple action can be the nudge you needed in the right direction to improve your mental health and make your life a better experience.

Remember a good day is a day where you learn something new ……..

Have a great week <3

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Nature as a mirror for our growth – the teachings of autumn

In you live in the world where it is autumn you cannot help but notice the beauty as nature shows us its full glory before the year darkens and hibernates. John Howard Bryant called autumn “the year’s last, loveliest smile.” For me it is a time when the world burst with it’s final boost of energy creating a masterpiece whilst gracefully surrendering to the winter. Autumn reminds me of a grandmother and child walking together through the piles of golden leaves. On the one side is the wisdom of a long life and on the other the playfull bursting energy of youth. Love it or hate it you cannot deny that the autumn is a striking time of year and one I find that has much to teach when we take time to listen.

This weekend I have been hosting two workshops about rerooting with and learning from nature and the wheel of the year (my heart project).Whenever I run these workshops I always learn and grow myself, which of course is a huge part of why I love to hold them. In the last two days I have had the opportunity to observe, reflect and connect with this beautiful time of year and as always in this time of reroot mother earth has given me some insights into my own and other’s life situations.  I would like to share these reflections with you.

The teachings of Autumn

In the last stages of life we are at our strongest and most beautiful. Autumn really shows us that the last stage of life, the last stage of growth is the most beautiful. The winds of change surround the trees but in that turbulence they stand strong and beautiful gracefully surrendering each leaf and the last seeds to the earth. The leaves are brittle as are we in old age however in their frailty they have a core strength which holds them on the trees until the moment when it is right to depart. In a way this can relate not only to the later stages of life but to our own struggles within life. During times of turbulence when we draw on our resources we can even when at our most fragile be strong and beautiful. When we surrender and let go we will fall to the forest floor however this fall is only the beginning of a new journey where the old feeds the new growth in the coming spring.

Letting go and Acceptance with dignity

It is in this process of shedding of leaves and turning to winter autumn is one of the most peaceful times of the year. Take a walk in a forest, park or even a graveyard and you will see that as our human world rushes by when we are with nature this time of year in particular has a special feeling of dignified peace. Autumn teaches us that change is inevitable and that it need not come with drama and struggle, that in fact natural change evolution happens in peace and dignity every year. For me it particularly reminds me that even within our time of dark (or the winter) that even in our shadow we are beautiful, graceful and dignified when we accept without judgement the process we are in.

Letting go does not mean we are weak and not effective

For some autumn represents a time of death and yes I agree with this as obviously all around us the non evergreen plants are dying. Yet I do not completely agree. If you take the time to look you will notice that there is still growth in autumn, it is slowed down, however in this time of peace it is there, the land is still fertile. I had the amazing opportunity to hear the inside of a tree gurgling (just like when you listen to a stomach). I had always thought that the sap within a tree retreats in the winter however what I learnt after (thanks google-fu) is that the sap within a tree slows down in the winter. It is still there hidden within nurturing the tree. Autumn shows that when we let go and slow down we can still be effective. We can still nurture and grow and achieve however it is at a slower pace. Slowing down can be just as beneficial and pushing towards a goal and by surrendering to the process as autumn does we are simply allowing ourselves to be efficient and productive in a different way.

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I believe that each season has a teaching for us if we take the time to look for it. One of the greatest things we can do for ourselves is to use nature as a mirror and learn how to observe what is happening to nature and compare it to where we are in our life at the moment.  Find some time to go out into the world this November and watch as the world turns from autumn to winter, give yourself the opportunity to reconnect and learn as well as simply enjoying this beautiful time of the year

Enjoy your journey <3

If you would like to find out more about working with nature as a mirror for your personalet growth then the Walking the Wheel of the Year personal development program could be for you – find out here

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